The AllGriffs Review 2020

Well, where does one start reviewing the story of a year like that? We had just got through Kate’s fourth eye operation in January and had celebrated Felicity’s 97^th birthday in March when the shutters came down. We all had to find new ways of living.

For us, lockdown was a time of quiet, calm introspection and companionship. Only a few of the long-delayed projects – sorting out the loft and the photo collection, writing our life stories, learning new skills, researching our family history – moved very far forward. Somehow, life was still full. The garden got weeded like never before and, once we managed to get some paint, we could paint the outside of the house. 

The great joy of May and June was the wonderful warm weather, the empty roads and the peace. Even without travelling, we could still walk from home around our glorious countryside: and we did. The birds seemed to be singing extra-loud and the wildflowers to be glowing in profusion. We learned about Zoom, sourdough baking and online quizzes.

As the restrictions lifted, we were able to visit Truro and talk to Felicity through a window. We could venture on new walks and, at one point, found ourselves in an almost deserted cove: ‘coincidentally’ another branch of the family was collecting cowries on the same beach. 

We could also play boats. Some pallets were turned into a raft for the creek’s silly swans who insist on building their nest below the tideline. Sadly they were not interested. We re-structured part of the fleet, saying goodbye to our dayboat Curlew, replacing her with an oyster punt (Oystercatcher) and later a Wayfarer (Sandpiper); oh, and we so needed another topper (Professor Plum).

By August, we felt bold enough to have a family holiday in Prussia Cove, a short drive away. This did us all some good and hinted at a return to normality. The sun shone, the mackerel were biting, the boats held water and no one drowned. It was like old times again. We had so missed our regular visits from the non-Cornwall-based members of the family this year.

Come September we were brave enough to go in search of some tidal swimming pools constructed in the late C18 and to find a wonderful C20 pleasure ground which had been completely overgrown.

To keep the grandchildren entertained, Jonathan constructed the long-awaited tree house, complete with zipwire. No one has yet broken any bones, though the noise levels have risen.

Kate then had her fifth (and final?) eye operation. It has been a long haul for her but we hope that we have reached the end and that her sight can settle down to a new near-monocular reality.

Just as everyone’s hopes were rising, lockdown 2 kicked-in and we reached for the paint pots again, for the inside of the house this time. Then things looked worrying in Truro and we found ourselves making daily visits to see Felicity who was going rapidly downhill. She eventually died peacefullyat the beginning of December, worn out by age and enforced seclusion. It has been wonderful to have her with us in Cornwall for the last six years and we will naturally miss her immensely. She joins many other close friends that we have lost this year, none from covid. We mourn them all.

Looking back through previous Reviews, we always try to be positive about the coming year, finding something that will make it look better than the last. Given the government’s mis-management of the pandemic and the nonsense of Brexit, the auguries do not look good but roll on the jab so that we can cross the Tamar for the first time in over a year. Then we can come and see you.

RIP - Felicity Griffin

8 March 1923 - 2 December 2020

We are sad to report that the matriarch of the family, Felicity Griffin, died peacefully on Wednesday 2 December at Tregolls Manor Care Home in Truro, at the tender age of 97.

We are all formed by our early lives, our education and our home lives. Felicity Grace Griffin (née Dobson) – ‘Joy’ to her family - was no exception.

Felicity was the daughter of a gentle, witty, high-church country Rector and a degreed teacher, whose own father had taken her out onto street corners as a child to seek converts to Primitive Methodism. Much of Felicity’s youth was spent in a large and rambling Rectory in the tiny village of Huntingfield in rural Suffolk. Christianity and a life of service were thus ingrained in her.

Her best playmates were her two brothers, Patrick and Michael. Despite her mother’s degree and teaching qualification, she took an unconventional approach to her own children’s education, initially home-schooling them before later sending them to local independent schools.

WAAF Driver Dobson

Felicity’s education was curtailed by the outbreak of war when she was only 16. As soon as she was able to, she joined the WAAF as a driver, fetching and delivering officers and bomber crews all over East Anglia; many never returned.

Marriage came in 1946 when Paul Griffin, a schoolmate of her brothers,  returned from his army service in the Far East, and a daughter, Angela, followed soon afterwards. When Paul went up to Cambridge to do his degree, they found lodgings in a tiny ramshackle converted storehouse and Felicity settled down for the major career of her life: service to Paul and her family.

Paul went to Uppingham as a young English teacher where they were joined by a second child, Jonathan. Both children were promptly very ill which challenged the young family and Felicity in particular.

The biggest adventure of her life came when they travelled to Cyprus where Paul became the Headmaster of the large English School during the period of EOKA terrorism. She had never travelled overseas before. The political situation limited what she could do but she managed to provide a secure home and happy upbringing for her children. She also found time to become the Brownie Commissioner for the island.

This was an era when a headmaster’s wife was regarded as free labour to support her husband, much as her mother’s life had been devoted to caring for the Rector. Both in Cyprus and latterly at Aldenham in Hertfordshire, Felicity threw herself into the task of being a headmaster’s wife, entertaining, steering and advising as needed. The domestic management skills learned in the Old Rectory came to the fore but at the price of close personal friendships which were precluded by her role and lack of free time.

Felicity and Paul in retirement in Southwold

Paul’s retirement from teaching led to a period running a language school in Cambridge before they settled in Southwold where they finally managed to establish their own group of local friends.

Felicity was a committed and excellent historian with a natural flair for the subject and would probably have studied it further if circumstances had been different. When in Cambridge for the second time, she qualified as a blue badge guide and enjoyed taking groups of tourists around the city, explaining the curious history of the colleges, kings and religious fights with the ease of an expert. She later organised and led historical tours around England and Wales.

Her work for her childhood church of Huntingfield was remarkable. When they returned to Suffolk, she set about raising money for the church in which she had worshipped as a child successfully getting grants and donations to repair the tower, roof and wonderful painted ceiling. Her research on Mildred Holland, the artist of the ceiling, was exemplary and has contributed to the church being ‘noticed’ far and wide.

She was fond of remarking that her guidebook to the church had sold more copies than any of Paul’s books of poetry or novels which showed that you did not necessarily have to have an education to be successful.

She also had a flair for interior and exterior design, creating and re-modelling several houses and gardens and was renowned as a great cook and hostess.

Angela, Felicity and Jonathan on tour

One big regret of her life was the limited opportunity for the use of her voice and acting ability. She had a lovely mellow speaking voice which she had used to good effect in tannoy announcements during the war. She toyed with applying to the BBC as an announcer but married life intruded and she contented herself with reading lessons in church and occasional play and poetry readings. This was not an age when married women had careers: service was her priority.

No mention of Felicity would be complete without a nod at the various dogs (and one goat) that were her loyal companions through life. Bonny in Uppingham; Honey who elected to join the family in Cyprus and Dinny who arrived at Aldenham. All adored her and will be fighting for attention and a walk when they see her again.

It was typical of Felicity’s attitude to service that, after the death of Paul, she watched over her young brother, Mike, then also nearing his end. It was not until he had died that she felt her work was done - her two brothers and husband no longer needed her – and she moved to Truro to be close to some of her family. From here, she kept an eye on her young Dobson relations, standing in for their missing parents and grandparents. She also received a warm welcome from the cathedral community, never missing an opportunity to remind them of the unwisdom of women priests.

An angel in St Mary's church bearing the 
Huntingfield arms (Courtesy of David Gentleman)

Two epitaphs come to mind. Christopher Wren’s ‘If you would seek his monument, look around you’ seems apt, for Huntingfield church will be watching over her in rest in ‘Dobson corner’ alongside her parents, husband and young brother.

Or George Herbert’s wonderful line ‘Who sweeps a room as for Thy laws, makes that and th' action fine’. This combines her Christian faith and sense of service as she was famous in the family for her ability to keep an exceptionally clean and tidy house.

In life, she broke several family records: the oldest member of the family ever (that we have yet found), and the oldest of three 'Mrs Griffins' (there have never before been three in a direct line).  

We remember with thanks a loving wife, devoted mother (to 2), grandmother (to 5), great-grandmother (to 8), aunt (to 6), great-aunt (to 14), great-great-aunt … a great cook and homemaker (her fruit cakes were legendary).

Jonathan Griffin, December2020

New - A Line to the Sea

Paul Griffin's last novel contains the reflections of Philip Burns on his life, his successes and failures as a teacher, poet, sea fisherman, operatic librettist, and husband. As a boy he discovered a flair for using words, an enthusiasm for them, a distrust of organised religion, and no wish to be sociable. 

In this intensely personal final novel, Paul weaves a tale in three parts which contains many echoes of his own life.

As with all of his books, A Line to the Sea is available from Lulu at £10.   

New - Green Belt

In Paul's latest book, the unexplained death of Colonel Fortescue sets in train a series of questions which intrigues James Underfield, the local vicar who just happens to be in love with a Swiss language school student. As the plot develops the multi-faceted nature of the Green Belt, its residents and their expectations emerges.

Eventually we begin to realise that, despite their rural pretensions, the motives and morals of those living in the Green Belt are little different from those of people living in the neighbouring city.

Having lived in the Green Belt for a dozen years and managed a language school, Paul brings his perceptive eye and ear to another story of human frailty and misunderstanding.         

New - Greek to Uncle Raymond

Life with Uncle Raymond is never straightforward, so when he generously takes his two nephews on a trip to Greece and Cyprus, it is unsurprising that things soon become complicated. Has Uncle Raymond's tendency to make much about very little put lives at risk?

Drawing on his own experience of visiting Greece as a young man, and of later living and working in Cyprus, Paul Griffin weaves a take of love , confusion and coincidence in countries that he knew and loved. 

This is Paul's second and last Uncle Raymond book. The first was a collection of short stories - A Degree of Uncle Raymond - which introduced the sage. This is a full-length novel.

Greek to Uncle Raymond is published privately by Lyon and Lamb, and is available for £10 from www.lulu/shop